doesn't feel like sunday

doing damage control to my overly dry foot and hands.
masker-ing now.
manicure and pedicure yesterday.

gotta continue the invitation today.
will go to another wedding tonight.

gotta start packing up these days.

haven't really think and ask myself.
--- this thing is coming....soon, real soon....

crazy how time flies ya?
hehehehe.....

not sure what i'm feeling now.
too many things going on in my head but really can't describe one by one.
that's weird.
too many things to do. but haven't really find the time to do it.
hmm....

wanna write. wanna dance. wanna drink until get drunk. wanna share. wanna think. wanna laugh. wanna jump. wanna pray together. wanna cheating the time. wanna rock the world. wanna read tons of books. wanna be alone.

think the hormones is talking.
mellow....

(almost) closing time....

the curtain is finally falling.
thank you so much for your help through out the years.

what i wrote for my-soon-ex-colleagues today.

"Crazy how time flies ya......
Still remember clearly my interview day with Bo Le in November 2007. It was one of the most interesting interview I've ever had.

As you guys know today is my last day working with Bo Le Associates. It is been a hard decision to leave the company but I realized that it is the right time to put a step on my dream (and not becoming a thai thai, I see it as a bonus...hehehe)

It has been a pleasure to work here, but more than that - it has been the privilege to have met and mixed with the people. I guess in the early days we didn’t have any choice but to get along, especially when you have a dozen people jammed into a single portable.
I have enjoyed my time here, and I will miss all that this place represents. As with any special place it is the people who make it and it will be those I will miss the most. Even though we are moving to new horizons in different directions, we will always have our memories of this place.

I won't mention anyone in particular, as it will take way too long, and my fingers are getting tired!
I would like to thank you for all your support, insights, and help you have provided me for the past 2 years.

I am sure reunions and catch-ups will, if not often, be full of laughs and good times, so if anyone feels the urge to contact me, here are my details:
Phone : 0813 1628 4445
Email: marini.hendarmin@gmail.com
And of course Facebook. :P

Goodbye for now, good luck and you never know, see you later!
Marini Hendarmin."

it's a bitter sweet feeling.
i am glad that i am out. on the other hand, i will miss the people here.
i am glad in so many ways - that finally i will put a step on my dream.

Adios people. will miss you all...........

long random post

2 hari lagi.
dan out...!

bitter sweet kinda feeling.

but di kantor kayanya more to bitter this week.
orang-orang lagi stress......

sleepy. wants nap today. hehehe

pengen ke bandung.
cari macem-macem. dari pigura, dasi buat bokap and able, kripik setan, lapo, dan tak lupa baju untuk diriku sendiri....
ahauehuae....

haven't really pack my stuff. haha.
nanti deh abis ini.

lagi ngopi nih. ngantuk skali.
wow...just get my energy back...awesome!
love coffee and ternyata orang hamil pun boleh ngopi.
hore!

nanti malem meeting. should be fun also. yeay!
trus ape lagi ya?
oh undangan is underway.
semoga we have enough time to send all of them.

it's less than a month and i single no more.
aih....cepet amat.
perasaan baru kemaren masih berantem-berantem defense keluarga masing masing.
kayanya proses persiapan ini lancar lancar aja. ga ada hambatan yg berarti, kecuali yg di awal awal itu.
other than that, we are great.

mendadak kayanya active banget otak gua. heheheh...
jumping from one thought to another.
tuing tuing...hihihi

i want candy!

pengen mani and pedi nih...kukunya udah pada jelek.
well, kukunya sih oke. tapi kutikelnya sangat mengganggu.
and a bit nyandu meni and pedi already. haduh...*tepok2 jidat*

rambut udah panjang banget niiiihhh...
abis 15 nov im so going to chop my hair off!
and oh excited of the trips we are gonna have in the coming week and months. :)

OH!
I'm wanna say a HUGE thank YOU to my super awesome Lord.
FOR EVERYTHING. EVERY SINGLE TINY things im my life.
can't mention one by one, but He bless me abudantly (read: ABUDANTLYYYYY)
and for that.....terima kasih.... :)

sometimes i wonder....why didnt i feel nervous like the others?
but one thing for sure, i have no doubt - that this is my path. and he's the one God sent me as my partner in this journey.
as we proceed through the preparation, my faith grew stronger. somehow :)
i know this journey is not all about candy, rainbow, and bed of roses (...and dont mind if it is tho...heheh).
i am well aware that this journey is about love and commitment.
im sure the journey is not gonna be easy. there'll be bumpy roads, rocky stages, and ugly moments which might turn us crazy (or crazier...hehe).
he can be the biggest j*ck*ss and i can be the biggest a b*tch...but it just us.
and as time goes by....i pray in God's name that we are getting stronger and wiser as a couple and an individual (giant amen!)

twenty seven hours to go

it's twenty seven hours to go...
...until i fly from this thing called the office...
....and be on my own....

can't wait, if you ask me.

not sure what would happen in the future.
but im sure im done here.

lately the office is kinda stiff.
stress out i think.

ngantuk.

one month and random post

today is exactly one month before the big day.
and just realized this morning.
hehehe....

crazy how time flies ya?
tsk tsk tsk....

pray pray pray so the final preparation going smooth and the d-day will be smooth....
but pray pray pray pray pray super hard so that the married life will be a great blessing for us and others :)
amen.

starts to realized even more that my decision to leave the company is soOOOooo right.
i am glad. i am more than glad. :)
i dont think i can (well, i want to) handle the pressure anymore.
2 years is more than enough.

getting more and more sure that handling my own finances is my real passion.
working hard for me, not for the company. i (ME, not the company) will enjoy the hard work (MONEY).

on other notes, my eyes getting blurry. i need to check them up soon.
after oct 23 i can do it lah.
so busy after the 23rd.

haiyoh. its getting closer. more money needed. (prayiiiiiiiinnnnggg)

suntuk

out of the blue.
slow but sure.
gua suntuk.
very upset.
not sure why.
feeling like ice cream, tapi ga bisa juga.
hmmm...
really wants ice cream and chillis at the moment.
damn

went to bali

went to bali last weekend for n&n's wedding.
regardless, all the hassles it was a great wedding. at least the bride and groom were happy. thats the most important thing.

i had fun.
i had lots of laugh.
i love bali. it was super hot, but i love it.
i love the fact that people wont stare for whatever im wearing or do.
hehehehe....

BUT!

i dont like kuta beach anymore.
too many abang2 iseng disana.
next time i go to bali, im pretty sure i'd pass kuta.

seminyak is my next destination. also, dreamland and ubud.
hmmm...kapan ya ke bali lagi?hihihihi

rain drops

rain drops.
rain drops.
rain drops.
rain drops.

love watching the rain drop.
it makes my heart warm somehow.
it makes my eyes heavy.
it makes my mind running through time.

i don't know what's with me and the rain drops.
think i'm falling in love all over again with it. :)

wish i'm in the apartment now.
with big glass windows. or just standing in the balcony watching rain drops with a cup of hot coffee in my hand. and mungkin a great book.
all alone.....man...that's heaven for me. :)

it's done!

Udah bilang.
udah announced.
it's done.
i'm relieved!
hehehehe.

gak peduli lagi.
lega, lega, lega, lega, lega....
hehehehe....

said and done.

udah bilang whatever i need to say. :)
lega.
23 oct will be the last day.
heheheh.
waktunya untuk santai2 kali ya.
take sometime off. belajar new things.

lega. lega. lega. lega.
terima kasih Tuhan.
Mohon bimbingannya in the future. :)

few scattered things.

lusa bonyok balik....yey!

besok senen lagi....damn....after one week of ga kerja...
hadoh....it'll be hard to start over lagi....

just realized im about to make my dream come true
gua inget, gua pernah bilang ke si gendut' "i want to be an investor, do nothing but invest"
trus just this morning nyadar kalo im actually going to do it in a few months time.
lots of thing to learn - the chart flow, the market condition.
lots of new jargons to understand. but im happy reading that stuff!
jadi inget masa2 ambil kelas finance 181 - investment management.
the professor, the load of the class, the final project (analyzing McDonald's stock value)
i remember i did enjoy that course...wahauehuaehua.....
btw, buku2nya kudu dibaca lagi kayanya...

on the other note, i am afraid. its the real world!it's not about what grade im getting....its real money!
once it's gone, it is GONE!*amit2*
haih....

oh ya....got my bridesmaid....yeaaaaaayyyy....
i believe she's the right person.... :)
after asking 2 persons.....turned 1 down, di turned down 1....dapet jugeeee.....
phew!

kudunya sih nyuci baju sekarang...
tapi males....ahauehaeuhuae....

oh ye, did express photo frame shopping last night. we managed to get 8 in less than 1 hr...ahauehue...oke lah yaaaaaa...

o iye lagi, balik ke idea kemaren...dapet meja buat telpon...yeay...tapi ternyata itu meja buat wine toh....oh well, tak ape lah...
naksir a white dining table buat meja di home office.....sukaaa banget ama tu meja since the first time i saw it....cuma agak kotor....semoga bisa dibersiin deh....hehehhe

semalem ngimpi soal resignation....hehehe....gonna come true soon....leganya.... :)

JEPUN it is!

vacation blues

will be having 3 days vacation in a few days.
no working mood find in the system.

tali jam tangan swatch gua putus.
hiikkk....
beli pake gaji pertama tuh....50 dolar....di swatch chicago. inget banget....

udah ga pengen kerja...pengen pulang aja
di rumah...mulai beresin buku2 buat dibawa ke apartment.hehehhe....nyicil gitu...hohohoh

mo pulang....

apparently....

It's not for me.
apparently....

yah...sutra lah ya...
sempet berpikir....percuma dong selama ini im asking my troops to pray...
percuma....
ternyata ga didengerin juga...

oh well...
its all just sink in now....

kecewa banget, i never (NEVER) pray this hard for something...never....
tapi nyatanya ga dikasih juga....
emang nasib, nasib...

honestly, i cant think any positive thoughts at the moment.
sutra lah ya...so just dont give me any positive feedback yet....
let me feel the dissapointment right now.

and i'll be okay soon.....promised!

2 weeks after that day....

is today....
how come i haven't heard anything ya?
haiyoh....
i don't like this....

should i call or not ya?
should i?
should i?
i think i'm gonna.....
i think i should, if i want something real bad, i think i should chase ye?
you think?

deg-degan banget sih.
tapi kok ndak ada kabar sama sekali yah?
this is not good man.
really not good.
*sigh*

boleh ga?

boleh ga kesel ama yg-di-atas-sana?
abis ga ada kabarnya sampe sore ini.
bingung deh.
ga sabar ye?
abis kesel.
gak jelas.
hik.

im a very impatient human.
im a human.
i have flaws.

i know i still have to work on it.
but i want this one soooo bad.
i really do.
bener deh. i really do.
never want something this bad.
let me correct it, this is one of the things i want real bad.

mau teriak, tapi tak berguna.
aku berdoa. berdoa banget.
aku pasrah. bener deh.
but right now i just want to let things out.
boleh kan?

will continue praying........

OH!

lupa cerita!
yesterday when i was on my way to the office ada orank norak!
emang biasanya gua suka nyanyi2 di dalem mobil...eh itu si norak ngeliatin gua sambil mesem2 sendiri...
ikh!
gua sebel, plototin balik aje....
rese lu!
ga pernah liat orang nyanyi2 di dalem mobil ye?
heran deh...
mind your own business dong!
gua tau lu punya mata, tapi mbok ya tau diri.
kalo emang ngeliat itu hak koe, tapi mbok ya tau sopan santun...kalo ngeliatin orang jangan terlalu obvious toh!!
jangan dipelototin like i am an object!!
sinting!
disangkain gua ga punya mata kali bisa dliat dia juga....
tolol deh...heran!
ga disekolahin ya??mungkin engga sih, secara you dont know how to behave....

oh well....

tunggu!

Tuhan,
kenapa belom ada kabar jugaaa???

sampe bingung....
ada apa ini?
and there's nothing i can do pula.
gosh, i hate this.

i know musti sabar...
and its not the deadline anyway.

iya lah....ngerti harus nunggu memang.
tapi kalo sampe besok sore ga ada kabar, boleh kan daku yg tanya?

penasaran deh...
kali iya ya iya....kalo engga ya sudah, but at least i know how to plan my life in the next months.
just wanna know the result.
hope it'll be mine. :)
i really do. :) :) :) :)

huh

kesel dah
nyariin romo kok susah banget yak...
dari minggu lalu nih...and i hate semua yg mendadak.
i like to plan things...ga suka mepet2 and dadakan!
apa lagi ini berhubungan dengan surat2 segala...this is sucks!
kesel!

gimana orang ga mo kesel sama something gereja related.
kebanyakan birokrasi, kebanyakan aturan. well, aturannya sih fine la. emang tujuannya biar jadi teratur and has system.
tapi orang2nya itu ga bisa diajak kerja sama.
they work there, and they should provide us with the service dong.
im sure they get paid.
and not sure how much. but its not the case lah.
you work there, and thats your job to help people who needed help.

susah banget sih.
keseeeeellll....

BOSAN

bosan sekali.
pengen pipis lagi.

bosan sekali.
pengen ujan.

hari ini panas banget.
nanti dinner nasi uduk.
aku lapar.

besok udah selasa.
berarti 2 hari lagi ke hari kamis.
berarti 2 minggu dari hari itu.
berarti hasilnya udah ada dong mustinya?
hope it'll be mine. :)

it's monday

..... 11 days after that meeting day ......

still no news.
still waiting.
still patience.
still praying (HARD).
still having faith.
still hoping for the best.
still surrendering.
still enjoying my day.

no damage done for the past few days. :)

semoga, semoga